Monday, September 4, 2017

Eddy's Love Work Experience

Eddie (fake name for anonymity), hired me for love work. He experienced some great movement nearly right off the bat and this is what he has to say about it.


Sent: Tuesday, August 29, 2017 at 5:58 PM
From: xxxx
To: DocConjure <MySecretHoodoo@mail.com>
Subject: The Work Isn't Even Done Yet...

Doc,

My mind is BLOWN and the work isn't even completed yet. Now I told you how bad things were with this girl that it was to the point she had literally blocked me off of everywhere & then unblocked me. So, that was 9 days ago. I woke up today and something kept telling me I should reach out to her but I said no let me wait until the work is done. That was my plan. Then, I'm going through my day and I just kept getting this odd nagging sense to reach out. I said what the hell and sent a very non-invasive text actually a picture of something I came across that she had given to me(a piece of Serbian currency she gave me on our first date) just saying "Look at what I found in my old wallet".

I expected no response. She saw the message and didn't reply. Doc, I don't know what you're working over there but I love it. About 40 minutes later I get a reply on my phone "Woww. Now you suprised me honestly. I didn't think when I look at this picture I remember everything abaut this day."

Next thing you know she wants to know how I've been and telling me all about her weekend and all of this. This is from someone who wouldn't so much as speak to me a mere week ago. THEN, she says "When you get back I want to go for coffee. I'm inviting you."

Doc, this never happened before I'm truly stunned. Sorry for the long message but I had to let you know this. God is good!

Feel free to put this on your blog if you'd like.

Stunned just stunned.

Sent from my iPhone

Wednesday, August 23, 2017

Stan's Reading

This is Stan (fake name for anonymity). Stan got a reading with me a while back and he recently emailed me to tell me that I was right on several things. This is what he has to say about his experience.


From: xxxx
To: DocConjure <MySecretHoodoo@mail.com>
Subject: Review of Previous Reading

My name is <<<>>>. I received a reading from Doc last October and, to be honest, at first I was not confused. It was the first reading I ever had and everything he predicted for the future seemed so far-fetched. Oddly enough, looking back a year later I'm emailing Doc back for another reading because what he ended up saying pretty much all came true. He told me my mother would become sick, and unfortunately she did have a health scare. He told me I would probably move out of the country in the next year, which when he said I thought for sure was wrong. Well, fast forward a year and I'm living overseas. The whole thing didn't seem to be like it would come true, but so many of the predictions that we discussed actually did. I would highly recommend getting a reading with Doc. At first, you may be confused (and maybe that's how it always goes with psychics, I don't know)...but in my case, in time a lot panned out. Very pleased. 

Sent from my iPhone

Tuesday, August 8, 2017

Update And Apology For The Lack Of Posts

Well, I thought I would drop in to give a brief explanation as to why I haven't been blogging as normal. I'm actually at a crossroads in my life. It's one of those situations where God/The Universe, is insisting that you are going to make some life changes.

So to give you a brief update, my readers should know that my mother was diagnosed with breast cancer. She had one breast removed and underwent chemo and radiation. They found that the cancer had spread to her lymph nodes so they removed them. When everything was said and done they discovered another lump in her second breast. That kind of infuriates me because I had already told my mother that if she is getting one removed she might inquire about getting the other one removed as well as a form of insurance against any further breast cancer. She said that it violated the doctors protocols to do such. Well, sure enough they discovered another lump in her other breast. I'm not sure what is going to happen with regard to that.

If the cancer wasn't bad enough, my mother left and moved way up north out of state. I have only texted her once since she left. I love my mother but she feels like a stranger to me and I know that I am not the only family member who feels like this. I keep telling myself that perhaps her drastic change in behavior is due to her chemo treatment, as it can effect the brain but am just not sure.

Additionally, I lost my day job over some bull shit excuse. I didn't do anything wrong and there is more to the story but it's a can of worms and it's better if I just leave it be. Two days after getting let go I got pulled over and got 2 tickets. If that wasn't bad, I came home to find one of my dogs dead, so I had deal with that. She had been sick and suffered from breathing problems and allergies all of her life so it was understandable.

My dad moved out the house and into my brother's home. Me, my sister and her fiance live here now. I will be staying here until I find another day job and a new home.  My sister and her fiance will be marrying this month, so that's good news. I'm happy for them and wish them success and happiness.

Now for the clincher, I was suffering from severe teeth pain after having two bad teeth and being unable to afford going to a dentist as I didn't have insurance at the time. So I was saving money. It ultimately cost me nearly $5,000.00 to get them fixed but that's all said and done now. Anyway, at the time I was a wreck from all of the pain. I quickly exhausted what little amount of pain pills that I had on hand and of course Tylenol, Advil, and the like do absolutely nothing for teeth pain. Even Anbesol is useless for anything other than very mild teeth pain. I tried that stuff last time I had teeth pain and it only made the teeth pain worse. I've heard about clove oil and I know that it does numb the area but I felt it would be similar to Anbesol. So in order to try to have as normal as possible a life before I could get my teeth fixed I began to use a completely legal herb called Kratom. It's a plant that has opiod-like properties. Because I had to take it for an extended amount of time I developed an addiction to it. So I had to go through withdrawal (on my own) after deciding to quit it. The withdrawals were super bad. Horrible. This said, Kratom is a remarkable plant. Not a single twinge of tooth pain when I was on it.

As a result of all the problems I was hit with at once I did slip into a depression. I'm on my way out and am climbing my way back to normal but it will just take some time. So I will be taking a breather from blogging for a while just until I can get things back to normal. I know that some of you may think that this was the result of a curse or an enemy throwing at me but I can assure you that I know how to handle myself and that each time I checked the answer was always no, that these things weren't the result of any enemies but where just natural life problems that just happened to converge upon me. I have been keeping up with my cleansings, as usual.

So, thank you readers for being patient. I shall return to blogging as soon as possible.

Oh, and if possible, say a prayer for my niece. She was recently diagnosed with lupus and needs some healing energy.

Thursday, June 22, 2017

Weight Loss Goal Reached!

After 2 years and one month I finally reached my goal weight! Honestly, I never thought this day would come. I hovered between 173-175 lbs, would dip down to like 171 lbs and then start eating crap again and gain a few pounds back. A few weeks ago I decided to put away the scale and just focus on enjoying life. I had already lost a ton of weight so I decided to just focus on what I have achieved so far. This morning I got the urge to weigh myself and gave in. I was completely shocked. I actually lost more weight and dipped below my goal weight of 170 lbs. I now weigh 168 lbs to be precise.

As my readers may know, in May of 2015 I had gastric sleeve surgery, a type of bariatric surgery. It was truly a life-changing experience.

So now that I've achieved my weight loss goal I am tempted to lose just a bit more. My doctor did tell me that I could go down to 160 lbs but that I shouldn't push beyond that. So I'm wondering if I should.

Now, I'm kinda petrified at the thought of having to have plastic surgery to get rid of excess skin. Unlike the gastric sleeve, the plastic surgery will be quite invasive. It will take a few months to completely heal and will probably hurt a great deal. I actually had no pain whatsoever with the gastric sleeve surgery.

So here are my stats:

Highest Weight: 412 lbs
Starting Weight Before Surgery: 388 lbs
Starting BMI Before Surgery: 52.6 (Morbid Obesity)
Weight At Time Of Surgery: 350 lbs
Goal Weight: 170 lbs
Current Weight: 168 lbs
Current BMI: 22.8 (Normal Weight)
Largest Pant Size: 48
Current Pant Size: 32
Largest Shirt Size: 4XL
Current Shirt Size: Medium
Total Weight Loss Since Surgery: 220 lbs

My Before Pictures:

Passport Photo - March 2015

December 2014

I'm the blob behind the boy.

Day of Surgery - May 13, 2015

My After Pictures:










If anyone out there is in the same boat as I was, is morbidly obese and may be considering this surgery. I say do it! I dare you! It will change your life in ways you wouldn't even dream could be possible. 

Tuesday, June 20, 2017

Happy Summer Solstice!

Tonight at 11:24 PM in the Northern Hemisphere the Summer Solstice shall begin. The Summer Solstice marks the time of the longest day (greatest amount of sunlight) of the year. The Sun appears to stand still in the sky, rising at the same exact spot for a few days before beginning it's movement across the horizon again. From this time onward the amount of daylight will decrease until we reach the Winter Solstice in December.

Today is the official start of the Summer season with tomorrow being the first full day of Summer.

An older name for the Summer Solstice is Midsummer. It is under this older name that Wiccans and modern Neo-Pagans celebrate. They also use the word Litha for this day as well. Christians celebrate the Summer Solstice under the guise of St. John's Eve and Day, which is held on June 23-24th.

Wishing All Of My Readers A Wonderful Summer Season! 


Sunday, June 18, 2017

Solomon Seal Root



Solomon Seal Root, a.k.a. Polygonatum biflorum, is a beautiful plant which grows in the eastern portion of the U.S. It gets it's name from the circular scars formed on the rhizomes (see second picture). Imaginative individuals claim the scars resemble the Seal of Solomon or the Star of David. It was this observation that made the plant desirable for hoodoo/conjure work.

The root is believed to share in the same powers as the legendary Biblical figure, mainly the power to grant wisdom and clarity to individuals, as well as to protect and control spirits. (King Solomon was said to be able to command the djin into building the first temple with the aid of a magic ring.) Solomon Seal, when mixed with other roots and herbs, is also really good for cleansing, uncrossing, and to exorcise people and places. In the latter use, the herbal mixture would be burned and the smoke would be allowed to fill the area. The use of Solomon Seal should not be overlooked when performing spells for love and business, as being able to make wise decisions are crucial for the attainment of success in both areas.

Solomon Seal Root does have it's medicinal uses but unless you know exactly what you are doing then I would caution against ingestion of the plant as it is toxic.

Solomon Seal Root is the main ingredient in spiritual products bearing the Solomon name, such Solomon's Wisdom oil, incense, or sachet powder. 

The first picture is a batch of Solomon Seal Root divisions that I am currently attempting to grow. I planted them a couple of months ago and to date there is no sign of activity. I am not alarmed and am opportunistic of seeing life from these little ones, hopefully, next year. 

Sunday, June 11, 2017

Magical Fortune Teller Miracle Fish!



I decided to pay a visit to my local occult shop and was delighted to pick this up. I haven't seen these since my childhood! It's a magic Fortune Teller Miracle Fish. In actuality it is a piece of cellophane that has been cut in decorated in the form of a fish. To use it you simply place it in your hand and it magically begins to move. You then divine the movements by the information provided on the back of the package it comes in. Below is the chart:

Moving Head...............Jealousy 
Moving Tail.................Indifference
Moving Head and Tail.........In love
Curling Sides...............Fickle
Turns Over...................False
Motionless...................Dead One
Curls Up Entirely.........Passionate

These cheap novelties make really cool gifts to kids. I bought a bunch to use as stocking stuffers for Christmas this year. 

You can purchase your own at the following link:


This one I purchased has gold foil-like decorations. This is different than the plan red ones that I remember from my childhood. 

I always assumed that the miracle fish worked by body temperature. However, according to this site below it actually works based on moisture (sweat) on your skin.


I also found this vintage video clip on YouTube where a man makes his own miracle fish. I'm not sure when this was filmed but it looks to be sometime in the 1970s. Was this the inspiration behind creating and marketing these novelty toys? 


Wednesday, June 7, 2017

Psycho Emailed Me

Got an email from a psycho who said he killed a black cat and got the bones and now needed help identifying the right one. Said he did it to protect his family. Shit like this freaks me out. People will do things without even pausing to question if such action is morally sound. The fact that he thinks that this is the only way to protect his family just shows how ignorant he is and especially since the black cat bone is not even primarily known for any protective qualities. For all the psychos and nutters out there, do not send me emails of you confessing to horrible crimes of animal abuse.

Sunday, June 4, 2017

Quick Money Spell

I received the following in a little gift bag I got from the New Year's celebration at a local occult shop. I had put the gift bag in a drawer and forgot about it and found it last night while cleaning. Inside the gift bag was a small plastic baggie filled with some type of green herb. It appears to be mint. Attached was a small piece of paper with the following spell.  The spell seems to be a bit more Wiccan in nature but it's interesting.

QUICK MONEY SPELL

During the waxing moon write your wish on a piece of paper. Place the herbs in the center and wrap it up in a bundle in a manner so that the herbs will not spill out. Tie this up with string making 9 knots. Chant the following:

Money shine and money flow
Money come and money grow
Money come right now to me
As I will it, so mote it be!

Take the bundle and burn it in a fireproof container and let burn completely. Scatter the ashes to the wind within 24 hours while repeating this chant. 

Monday, May 29, 2017

My Experience With A Cult

This month marks my one year anniversary of escaping a cult. That's right. Your's truly got suckered into joining what I now know to be a cult but at the time thought was a really cool semi-religious/philosophical movement. I will be as blunt and upfront as possible. I make no excuses. I was seduced into joining mostly because I ignored early warning signals.

Let me give you some back story. As a child I loved reading about Greek mythology. I remember my very first exposure to the Greek myths. I was enrolled in a version of daycare that was run by my then church. I can't remember how old I was but I was old enough to read. I remember going through the bookcase and found one odd book. The bookcase was filled with Christian books for kids, stories of Noah, the garden of Eden, the life of Jesus, even bibles with pictures for kids. That one odd book I discovered was about Greek mythology. After reading I formed the opinion that Greek mythology was way cooler than the Christian stories that adults told me. I was so very much interested in it that I began telling other kids about it. That's when trouble started. One of the adults heard me talking about other gods while holding the book. She yanked it out of my hand, swatted me on the butt, and forced me into a corner of the room. I became angry and said something, not sure what, but she then yanked me into the bathroom and washed my mouth out with that "pink lotion" liquid soap that used to found in nearly every public restroom. I think I threw up afterward. Her treatment (abuse) of my solidified my contrarian ways. I loved Greek mythology and was not going to let this woman stop me from enjoying it. From that time onward every time I went to the library I checked out books on Greek mythology. 

Fast forward to about a year and half ago. I'm online and am reading some old message boards. One post caught my eye. It was a woman communicating to some guy and telling him that the ancient Greek traditional "pagan" religion is not dead and never actually died out at all. She the provided a means of contacting another man who could be his teacher if interested. I was intrigued.

Now, my warning bell did alarm. The claim that the ancient Greek traditional religion survived the coming of Christianity sounded like pure hogwash to me. I've heard similar tales coming from Wiccans and other Neopagans, with all such claims being incredibly easy to debunk. However, I was curious enough to give it a shot. I emailed the man and introduced myself. Thus began my first contact with what turned out to be a cult and it's leader. 

I won't provide details or identify this man. I will state that my initial exchanges with the man were pleasant and rather fascinating. I asked him if it was true that the ancient Greek religion survived the coming of Christianity and he said yes and no, that the temple, public, and private worship were obliterated but that one single piece survived. That piece was one of the mystery religions that was able to survive because it morphed into more of a philosophical movement that was passed down through the centuries to chosen individuals. He the advised me that what has survived was the mysteries of Orpheus, or Orphism. I was aware of Orpheus due to my love of Greek mythology. 

For those who don't know, Orpheus was a demigod, the son of a King and one of the Muses. He was considered to be the best musician and poet. His music was so powerful that it charmed all of creation. His basic story goes as follows;

Orpheus was married to Eurydice. Eurydice ends up dying in some fashion, either while trying to flee being raped by a god or else being bit by a venomous serpent. Orpheus was so grieved that he took up his lyre and traveled down to the Underworld in order to retrieve his dead wife. Once there, he was able to secure an audience with king and queen of the dead, Hades and Persephone. He played such beautiful music and sang such beautiful songs that Persephone's cold heart melted and she began crying. Seeing her tears, Hades granted Orpheus' request of having his wife back from the dead as long he was able to obey one simple rule. The rule was that Eurydice would walk behind Orpheus and that at no time should he ever turn around to look at her until they were both back on the surface of the earth once more. Of course, this turned out to be a rule that Orpheus simply could not stop himself from breaking. He was so paranoid that he had been tricked that he eventually turned around to check if his wife was truly behind him. He saw the surprised and saddened look on her face as she was yanked back down into the Underworld. He begged for another audience with Hades but was declined. Orpheus returned to the world depressed. He wandered the earth spreading secret information about the gods and their proper worship. This would become the very first mystery religion, the Orphic mysteries. Eventually Orpheus was attacked by a group of Maenads (female worshipers of Dionysus) who decapitated him using their bare hands. His head was flung into a river and magically continued singing for a great time until the gods demanded it be silent.

This man said that what survived Christianity was this mystery religion, the teachings of Orpheus. He offered an invitation to become his student. I accepted. I began weekly sessions with him over Skype. The sessions were originally supposed to be just 45 minutes but usually lasted around 3 hours. I quickly became hooked. 

Now, I'm an intelligent man. I asked for evidence. I was provided such. He quoted me sayings from philosophers and great thinkers from 1100-1300 AD which to my amazement did seem to suggest they were alluding to the fact that the Greek worship of the old gods never truly died out. The temples were destroyed. The sacrifices and rituals stopped. Idols were smashed. But the teachers continued on disguised as philosophy. 

The teachings were of thus:

- The knowledge and worship of the 12 Olympians (Zeus, Hera, Poseidon, Demeter, Athena, Ares, Apollo, Artemis, Hermes, Aphrodite, Hephaestus and Hestia) Note: In some versions of the 12 Olympians, Dionysus is listed as a member with the belief that Hestia gave up her throne for him. I was taught this was a false belief that was invented by Robert Graves. A god can not give up his/her throne. Dionysus, though an important figure, is not one of the 12 Olympians. Though other gods exist, only the great 12 Olympians are worshiped. 

-What the gods are. (This is completely different from what most people are led to believe. Think more along the lines of energy.)

-The gods have their own symbols, their own colors, their own numbers, their own favorite offerings. (This is very similar to what is found in African Traditional Religions).

-The Orphic Hymns are like "the bible" of the religion. They teach how to properly make offerings to the gods as well as what they like.

-The myths should not be taken literally. They are all meant to be viewed symbolically and allegorically. They are also just the opinions of the individual story-tellers. The myths often portray the gods as being human-like and imperfect. In reality the gods are perfect beings. 

-How to pronounce the names of the gods. (Modern English pronunciation of the names of the gods is completely incorrect. Take Zeus for example. Most English-speaking people pronounce it as "Zoos". This is incorrect. It's actually pronounced, "Zefs", with an "f" sound before the final "s". I will give the correct pronunciation below:

Zeus - "Zefs"
Hera - "E-rah" 
Poseidon - "Poe-see-thon"
Demeter - "Day-May-Tayr"
Athena - "Aht-hay-nah"
Ares - "Ah-rays"
Apollo - "Ah-pohl-on"
Artemis - "Ar-tay-mees"
Hermes - "Air-mees"
Aphrodite - "Ah-fro-the-tee"
Hephaestus - "Ee-fess-tohs"
Hestia - "Es-tee-ah"


- The 12 Olympians are worshiped in pairs, never singularly. There were 7 pairs. The two gods are wed, as in actually married, despite what the myths may say. Those pairs are:

Zeus-Hera
Poseidon-Demeter
Heres-Athena
Apollo-Artemis
Ares-Aphrodite
Hephaestus-Hestia
***Hermes-Aphrodite (A very special pair, a hermaphrodite.)

- We are all "children of the gods" so to speak. Each of us has both mortal and divine parents. For example, my divine parents were Aphrodite and Ares. (This concept is very similar to the view found in African Traditional Religions.) A person's divine parents will be one of the pairs listed above. To uncover your pair requires self-knowledge and introspection. 

- That we constantly die and are reincarnated.

- That Zeus loved us so that he sent his son Dionysus to free us from the constant cycle of birth-death-rebirth and suffering. (This is not copying from Christianity! This belief is older than Christianity. In Greek mythology, specifically the Orphic creation myths, humans were created after Dionysus was murdered and his remains were incorporated into what would become human beings. Thus humans are part-divine and have the potential of becoming gods.)

- How to become gods, our proper place in the Universe. 

So this is the information that I feel comfortable sharing at this time. I was truly fascinated with this material. The Orphic Hymns were like the bible of this religion. A completed Orphic creation myth has been compiled from sources. Certain rituals have been lost but the hymns themselves tell of how to worship the gods and what to offer them. 

So I fell for this line and sinker. Now, is this true? I'm still torn. Part of me thinks it's bull shit. Part of me thinks it may actually be true and just that I stumbled upon a complete perverted asshole who attempted to hijack it for his own sexual satisfaction. On to more warning signals....

On my very first Skype session, the first time this mans saw me and I saw him, he said to me (paraphrased):

"Well, I much prefer to take on young men as students, about 18-19 years old. However, you look very good for your age. You are a very attractive man. You definitely don't look your age. I would say you look like you are in your mid to late 20s."

What? What does my age have to do with becoming a student? Why did he add on the compliments? 

I soon began to uncover the reasons. He was in his mid 60s. He was gay. He was HIV positive. He preferred young men about 18-19 for sex partners. He had at least one past student as a lover. This past student had learning disabilities. This man complained on having to spend money on this boy in order to keep his affections. Ultimately the boy decided he wanted to nothing to do with this creep but the man still wants him back and is still trying to get him back. 

This man also dropped the following (paraphrased):

"Let me put it this way. I would definitely have sex with a man older than 18-19. Take you for example, I would enjoy having sex with you. It's just that I would not be able to have romantic feelings toward you. I really only develop romantic feelings for younger men. I would even have sex with a man my age."

I knew these were major red flags. So I was definitely not naive. I recognized this as troubling signs and kept a mental note of them. 

This man who now called himself my teacher claimed that he was brought into the religion after meeting another man on chat. The other man was an elderly man, a native of Greece, who was speaking out against Wiccans and other Neopagans who were claiming to be resurrecting the ancient Greek religion and worshiping the Greek gods. This elderly man was basically telling these people to leave it alone, that the Greek religion was not dead but has survived as philosophical teachings. So my teacher decided to contact the man and actually went to Greece. He was taken into the community and introduced to the elders. They were all normal people who knew fascinating information. 

My days with this cult were numbered. It seems I asked too many questions and have too many quaint ideas, such as that one should be given the freedom to form opinions that differ than your own. It appears that my teacher did not believe in such. We began to argue or petty things. He insisted that only his opinions counted and that I had to admit I was wrong even though my opinion could be backed up with actual evidence. Eventually it got to the point where he even demanded that I believe the gods were real beings, as if having actual bodies similar to humans. That's when the shit hit the fan because I refuse to accept such strict absurdities. My religious and spiritual beliefs demand far more freedom of movement. I tried to explain my belief, that ultimately there is only divinity and that people have just given different names to such across cultures throughout time but he would have nothing to do with it and wasn't interested. When I flat out refused to accept that the Greek gods have bodies like humans he basically said we came to an impasse and that he could no longer be my teacher, that I wasn't right for this religion. I politely informed him that his HIV medication may be effecting his thought processes, a known side-effect of certain medication, and he said he agreed to a point. Previously he had displayed memory problems and began missing and showing up late to scheduled class times, not to mention becoming irate and angry over the most inconsequential things. I also told him to leave 18-19 year old boys alone, that they preferred people their own age, and that yes, the only reason why one would give a 60+ year old man the time of day is if said man had money they were willing to spend on them, that such was the cost of having a young boyfriend. I also told him that an HIV positive person should never have sex with such a young person. That seemed to really piss him off. LOL 

So there you have it. I have experience with a cult. Hopefully, it will be the last experience with a cult that I ever have. If in the future you should happen upon a group that espouses some of the same info that I wrote about in this blog, be warned. Things may not be what they first appear. I'm still split on whether there is any truth to this at all or if this creep just made up everything. 






Saturday, May 27, 2017

Actor/Comedian Jamie Foxx Wears "Come To Me" Cologne!

On Thursday's (5/25/17) episode of Live with Kelly and Ryan, actor/comedian Jamie Foxx was asked by Kelly what cologne he was wearing. He answered, "It's called Come To Me".  Hmm....is Jamie Foxx a believer or possibly a practitioner?

For those who may not know, "Come To Me" is a hoodoo formula for various spiritual products, such as, oils, incense, sachet powder, bath and floor wash, as well as cologne, that is designed to draw a new lover to you. Come To Me is very good to use on a specific person you would like to draw near to you for love or sex.

Friday, May 26, 2017

Florida Water Warning!

So I'm lighting a lamp for a client and had rinsed my hands with Florida Water to cleanse them before starting. I struck a match and was lighting the wick when my entire right hand became engulfed with flames. It scared the shit out of me! Luckily, there was no burns as I quickly shook out the flames. Let this be a warning to readers. Anything with alcohol is flammable and can post a fire risk!

Tuesday, May 23, 2017

2 Year Anniversary Of Weight Loss Surgery

I apologize for this break in blogging. I've been extremely busy with life stuff these past weeks. I hit another milestone as well, my two year anniversary of my weight loss surgery on May 13.

I am still completely shocked that a mere two years ago I was almost 400 lbs, had sleep apnea, borderline diabetes and high blood pressure, and had pretty much accepted that I was not long for this earth. My weight loss surgery truly saved my life.

For my readers who don't know the story, I went to Tijuana to have my procedure. I had the gastric sleeve surgery. About 80% of my stomach was removed. A normal stomach is about the size of a football. My new stomach is the size of a banana. There is a hunger hormone called ghrelin that is produced by the stomach. Since 80% of my stomach is gone, I therefore don't experience true hunger like I did pre-surgery. I do not feel I'm dieting or starving at all and even though I'm eating far less than what most people eat. The reason for this is that when the stomach is full it sends signals to the brain which are then interpreted as being satiated. So my new stomach does this as well but off of a very small portion of food. Pre-surgery I could eat an entire large pizza, salad, order of bread sticks, and dessert as one meal. Post-surgery I can eat one slice of pizza and may not even be able to eat the entire slice, depending upon how thick the crust is!



I decided to go out of the country because in my area the surgery runs around 20k and is usually not covered by insurance. I researched it for a year before my surgery and chose my surgeon in Tijuana and paid $4,500 for the surgery.

So let me give a break down of my stats:

Highest Recorded Weight: 388 lbs (There were times I was over 400. I believe 412 was the highest I have ever been. However, at the time that I chose to have the surgery I was 388 lbs.)
Weight On Day Of Surgery: 350 lbs
Current Weight: 174 lbs
Former Shirt Size: 4XL
Current Shirt Size: Medium
Former Pant Size: 48
Current Pant Size: 32
Former BMI: 52.6 (Morbid Obesity)
Current BMI: 23.6 (Normal Weight)
Total Weight Loss: 214 lbs

The goal weight I set for myself is 170 lbs. A couple of months ago I got down to 171 lbs and was so very close to achieving my goal weight. However, I messed up and started eating garbage again. I ended up gaining 3 lbs. I'm now back on track.

Another error I made was I stopped focusing on protein. I'm supposed to get 60-80 grams of protein a day. Well, when I was eating crap there were days where I didn't get any protein. My average for months was probably around 20 grams of protein a day. As a result of my mistake I began to shed hair. So my hair is thinning. I've returned back to the protein so hopefully I will be able to reverse this. If you don't get enough protein your hair and nails will suffer.

Since my surgery I've had several people tell me that I was the inspiration for them looking into or deciding to get the same or a similar surgery as well. I am very pleased that I've been an inspiration to people. If any of my readers are in a similar situation to me, facing morbid obesity, then I would strongly recommend you look into getting the surgery. It will literally change your life in ways you never even dreamed possible.

Psychologically, I'm still adapting to the changes. I still have some issues with accepting the new me. I still have a bit of body dysmorphia, meaning that I still perceive myself to be the same fat person I was before surgery. I also have some issues with women and men being sexually attracted to me. I didn't get anywhere near the level of attention I now get from people and I feel I can be too awkward when hit on. Hopefully in time I will adapt and be able to embrace the new me and live my life to the fullest.

I have not yet had plastic surgery to remove the excess skin. I do have excess skin, mainly on my stomach, some on the chest, and some on the thighs. I will be honest to admit that I dread the surgery because unlike the weight loss surgery, plastic surgery is a very invasive surgery and can take a few months to heal. However, I know that to complete this metamorphosis that I will have to suck it up, invoke courage, and see this journey through.

My only regret is that I did not have the surgery sooner. I'm also a bit ticked off. This surgery has been around since the 1980s but really wasn't used on morbidly obese people until around 2007. If I would have had this surgery in my teens or 20s then my life would have been a lot better, in my opinion.

My Before Pictures:

Passport Photo - March 2015

December 2014

I'm the blob behind the boy.

Day of Surgery - May 13, 2015

My After Pictures:









So I will end with this. Do not let fear prevent you from being the person you were meant to be! Be courageous and dare to embrace change. 

Related blog entries:



For those who are curious about just how much I can eat after surgery, here are two pictures of a standard-size bowl of Frito pie. I can eat about half of a bowl of food at one time. 

Before Eating

Full!

If I continue to eat past the point of being full I will vomit. So I quickly learned to stop eating as soon as I felt full. Again, I do not feel true hunger, nor do I feel that I'm depriving myself. This tiny amount of food produces the same sensation in me as if I just got through eating Thanksgiving dinner. So I feel completely satiated. I do not cheat or try to eat every couple of hours. I eat 3 meals a day and some days I eat some snacks as well. I can even eat fast food. I can eat a McDonald's cheeseburger in one sitting (either no fries or just a few), 1-2 tacos (depending upon how long it's been since I've last eaten), and one slice of pizza (depending upon size of crust). I can eat a ton of salad and stuff like chips, crackers, and popcorn. These types of food are called "slider foods", because they literally slide right on through your stomach, meaning you can eat a very large portion. I've been able to eat a large bucket of popcorn at the movies, for example. Of course, these "slider foods" are no-nos and can cause weight gain if not kept in check.


Saturday, May 6, 2017

Beginners Guide To Sex Magic



Sex magic....what is it?

I know the first time I heard of sex magic I automatically entertained thoughts and visualizations of naked bodies of both sexes undulating and penetrating orifices indiscriminately. I guess that's just my dirty mind at work. In reality, sex magic is a very primitive and powerful way of raising energy in order to manifest your desires. The purpose of this blog entry will be to explain the very basics for would-be practitioners.

Sex magic can be practiced alone or with a partner. Beginners should start off doing it alone and then move toward practicing with a partner who is comfortable with such and is willing to aid you in your endeavor. The following is just a guide for newbies. Feel free to reject anything that you personally don't feel comfortable doing or anything that you feel is not applicable or right for your situation.

1. Define the goal, purpose, or clarify the desire. You need to know what it is you want to manifest prior to performing sex magic.

2. Cleanse the area. I like to perform a simple cleansing of the area in which sex magic will be performed. Smudging and burning incense are good, simple ways of achieving such.

3. Cleanse yourself. Take a spiritual bath or perform a simple cleansing on yourself to wipe away any negative energies that you may have picked up over the course of your daily life.

4. Set the mood/atmosphere. Dim the lights or light candles. Burn incense if you prefer. If you do not live alone then make sure the doors are locked or that you have privacy. If you would like to have soft music playing in the background then such is fine. Just make sure it isn't too loud or isn't of the type that may cause you to break your focus or concentration. Classical music may be best. Any music that inspires eroticism would be good. Probably not wise to play your favorite hits lest you start singing along or really getting into the song instead of your magic. If you are burning candles then you can go ahead and fix candles for your magical purpose, such as using proper color, marked/carved, and dressed with proper corresponding condition oil. Otherwise, you can just burn any candle of any color. Your incense can also be chosen by purpose as well or just use whatever incense your prefer.

5. Wear whatever attire you prefer or nothing at all. It all depends on what turns you on. If you feel that a certain article of clothing or even color of clothing feels good on your body or stimulates your passion and power, then by all means wear it. Otherwise get butt naked!

6. Begin masturbating. Start of slow and build to a climax but do not allow yourself to actually climax. For men, this is called "edging". You can begin your self-stimulation in the normal means but make sure that you ultimately reach the point of full body stimulation. Women are just naturally better at achieving this because society permits women to be sensual. Unfortunately, society tends to label male sensuality as being "too feminine" or relating it to homosexuality. Since men tend to focus on the genitals its important for men to explore and stimulate their entire body. Embrace your sensual side. Rub and caress your skin. Stimulate areas you may have not even considered touching before during masturbation, such as your feet, arm pits, back, etc. A full body experience is needed. It is also important for this that you do not keep track of time. You need to lose yourself in your ecstasy. Repeatedly allow your pleasure to build to the point of climax/ejaculation but do not allow your self to achieve such. Hold off and start slow again and build until your reach the same level of stimulation. While doing this you will visualize what it is you would manifest into reality, specifically the end result. So for example, if I wanted to have sex with a particular woman then I would visualize having sex with this woman. I would not visualize how this all came about and what would lead us to sleeping together. That part is out of my hands. Only focus on the end result.

7. When you do finally climax/ejaculate/orgasm it should be extremely powerful and should come during a moment of exceptionally clear visualization of the desire that is to be manifested. Now, 9 times out of 10 this will go smoothly. You can then bask in the afterglow and go to sleep if you want. I prefer to go to sleep as I feel that this pushes the desire deeper down into the subconscious mind. I also feel that it gives a better closure to the ritual. If you prefer not to got to sleep then you can then get up and quietly clean up and then move on with your day to day life as normal.

Now, I've read online that one shouldn't use sex magic in matters of love. For example, some would say not to use sex magic to draw a specific person to you because it will not work on them but it would cause you to grow obsessed with such person. I can see this logic but don't necessarily agree with it entirely. I believe that if the person you would like to take as your lover has given you signs that they are mutually attracted to you then you should totally use this method. However, if this is a stranger who doesn't even know you exist then you probably aren't going to see good results with this method simply because most people don't just jump into bed with complete strangers. Sure, you might get lucky every now an then but in the long run it's not going to be a good tactic or technique. Now, if you are using sex magic to reconcile or draw back a lover, or to even influence a lover, then you should be perfectly okay using this method.

Another thing readers should be aware is that sexual fluids gathered from a sex magic rite are extremely powerful. You can use such to dress candles, amulets or talismans, mojo bags, etc., and especially if you are doing other forms of magic to back up your sex magic.

Just remember that sex magic can be used for anything. It's not just good for love or romance. It's a tool or technique that can be used to achieve and manifest your desires.

If you chose to perform sex magic with a partner or even group of people then please be aware that you will need to trust your partner(s) as having the same desire or outcome. For example, if your partner has voiced their opinion and it is contrary to your desire then I would not recommend you work with them in a sex magic rite because their energy is going to counter-act your own. It's best to have a partner who either holds the same desire as yourself or at least is of an opinion that is not against the manifestation of your desire. If you prefer, your partner can be kept in the dark as to the purpose of the rite. This way the partner will act to help build sexual energy while not actively working to manifest it.

Certain individuals, such as Aliester Crowley, advocated that same-sex partners produced the most powerful sex magic. I believe this stems from homosexuality being "forbidden". It's up to you on whether or not you chose to accept this as part of your reality. I would venture to state that if you have same-sex sexual desires that you have not acted on before then perhaps it could be a very powerful experience for you as you would be tapping into something you haven't tried before. However, if you have a natural repulsion to such then I fear any same-sex rite could be detrimental toward the manifestation of your desires. Know yourself and your limits.





My Favorite Hunger Episodes

The Hunger was a horror anthology series that aired on Showtime from 1997 through 2000. The second season was hosted by David Bowie. The series dealt with many paranormal and supernatural themes, usually involving human desires and the consequences of such. Below are some of my favorite episodes from the series. Word of warning, many of these episodes contain nudity and adult situations.

Bridal Suite - When couples check in to a bed and breakfast the husband often disappears.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sgJH4IQwv8o

The Face of Helene Bournouw - A string of remarkable individuals kill themselves after meeting an extremely seductive woman.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=409VSmpj3AE

Clarimonde - A new priest has his faith tested by a beautiful seductress who is not what she appears to be.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jc1gTk4m9rc

Nunc Dimittis - A dying man finds a male prostitute to take his place serving a very special princess.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rXcl9h3PW7U

Week Woman - A man marries a lesbian to avoid being deported. He soon discovers a secret about her, one that transforms her into his ideal mate.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=B46udeTph2A

The Diarist - This is my favorite episode of the series. A young witch is frustrated by the failures of her curses cast against the lover who left her for another woman.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aF1_1QRyZgY&t=580s

Bottle of Smoke - A woman finds a djinn in a bottle. Instead of granting wishes it can fulfill all of her sexual desires as long as she remembers never to break a very important rule.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mQEqL7Bp3n0

Brass - A man inherits a strange brass bed from his occultist father.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XMGEsVWJ5-U

The Seductress - An older woman breaks off the sexual relationship she is having with a teenage boy leading to unforeseen supernatural repercussions.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MSDNmyAcSBo









Reminder

I don't give free readings. I don't give free "spot checks" for your issues. I don't give a free diagnosis to determine if you are crossed up or cursed or if someone is working on you as well as determining the identity of said person. I won't call you for free and will not even consider doing any free work for you if you situation is not an emergency. I won't do any of these things because my time is valuable and you are not entitled to any free shit. Please don't waste my time by emailing me with your sob stories as to why you think you are unique and deserve special treatment.

You can pay to get a reading if you want a reading.

You can pay to get a reading to determine if you are crossed up or cursed.

You can pay to get a reading to possibly determine the identity of the person who is working against you.

You can pay me to perform conjure work for your non-emergency situation.

You can pay me for conjure coaching to learn how to do things for yourself.

Unfortunately, my life has been extremely hectic for the past few months and I'm frankly sick of opening my email and seeing dozens of emails from people who claim to read my blog but who think that they are entitled to free stuff. For instance, I opened two emails today from people who typed something similar to "I need to speak to you immediately about my situation", followed with a phone number, as if I would just pick up the phone and call you and spend an hour or more talking to you for free.

I give free consultations by email only. A free consultation is not the same thing as a free reading. Just like if you got a free consultation with an attorney he or she would not bust out the tarot cards or crystal ball but instead would talk to you about your case. Well, that's what a consultation is, discussing your case/situation.

I also got an email today from a woman who felt like she was entitled for me to give her a free reading to determine if she was cursed as well as tell her who did it. When I responded to her that I don't give free readings she responded rudely back as if it was a crime to ask to be compensated for your time and gifts. If people only knew what bull shit workers have to put up with. LOL

Sunday, April 30, 2017

Hoyt's Cologne


So I recently bought my first few (3) bottles of Hoyt's Cologne. I know they are a staple in hoodoo of the past. In fact, before Florida Water practitioners used this cologne instead. There is only one problem. It's simply just not worth the price and is not readily available.

Don't get me wrong, I love the smell. For those who have never smelled it I can assure you that it's pretty much dead on to English Leather. So if by chance you can't get a bottle of Hoyt's Cologne then maybe you might try substituting a bottle of English Leather instead.

I would personally use this as an aftershave. It smells good but doesn't last. Magically, I would use it for luck, money and love, to feed mojo bags, and perhaps to cleanse lodestones. I would not use it to clean my hands before doing work, such as with Florida Water.

This is the largest bottle in the pic above and it ran around $12, so way more expensive and less quantity compared to a bottle of Florida Water.

So if you get a chance to buy a bottle then I would recommend it. It's so heavily quoted in Hyatt's hoodoo material that it's good just to have for it's historical value.

My Adam And Eve Roots Have Arrived!





A few weeks ago I ordered and received two shipments of Adam and Eve roots, a.k.a. Putty roots, or Aplectrum hymale. You may or may not know, but Adam and Eve root is a type of orchid. I've heard over and over again throughout the years that it is endangered and that it should not be picked and definitely should not be sold. To my delight, I discovered that that is simply not the case at all. 

I'm relieved that Adam and Eve root can now be ordered online. You can buy a half a dozen or more roots for relatively cheap. I bought a couple of sets, one to plant and one to dry and use in my conjure work. I'm really nervous because I've read online that it is extremely difficult to grow these once transplanted and that they pretty much prefer to remain in the exact location where they originally grew. So it will be an experiment for me. I will let you know if they grow and are successful. 

So what this basically means is that now there is no reason why you need to buy fake crap from Indio, such as the one Balm of Gilead and one peanut-looking-thing that they sell as their version of "Adam and Eve root". You can just buy the real thing now and don't need to substitute at all. This also means that all kinds of "Adam and Eve" spiritual products can be made with the real root. So I've very excited! 

In the past, I've been asked which is the Adam and which is the Eve root, or which is the male and which is the female root. I never viewed it as such. I just assumed that the root gets it's name because it looks like two roots joined together, such as in the last picture above, so there would not be a separate male and female root. It would just be "Adam and Eve root" in the singular and not separated out like with lodestones. However, that's just my understanding and if I'm wrong then do correct me. 




A Dark Song (2017)

A woman hires a ceremonial magician to perform a series of complex rituals that will allow her to speak to her dead son as well as get revenge on his murderers.


I saw this last night. Not sure how I felt about it. To be honest, I thought the ending was stupid. It is longer than it should have been and the magician is a misogynist. I would say it's worth one watch but I don't consider it to be a great movie.

Friday, April 28, 2017

Monday, April 24, 2017

Lost My Dog A Few Days Ago

I came home to discover my black cocker spaniel dead. It was a shock. She was over 10 years old so she led a good life but it's still sad. She had been hacking up stuff but was eating and drinking normally. If I were to guess she died of something like pneumonia or bronchitis. I remember her as a puppy. She was the shyest thing I've ever seen. She hid behind the furniture for weeks until she warmed up to people. It took her forever to learn to climb up the stairs. Then she learned to climb up the stairs but couldn't figure out how to get back down so she would just sit there and cry for me to come get her and take her down. She used to wake me up each morning by licking my face and she demanded love 24/7. You would literally have to push her away because she would just demand you pet her non-stop. She was not a bright dog. I believe she had some form of disorder or disease. I joked around that she had doggie-down syndrome but she definitely had something. I still love her regardless and I know she's up in doggie heaven chasing birds and mice. R.I.P. Precious.

Sunday, April 2, 2017

Turning A Man Gay, Straight Men Who Look At Gay Porn, And Sex Between Straight Men

This blog entry was originally going to be a Q & A post but I had two people ask me about turning a man gay and sex between straight men that I thought I would focus on these two issues before. If you are a reader of my blog then you are probably already aware that I've already discussed about whether or not it's possible to turn a straight man gay. However, I will see if I can take a different approach at explaining this in hopes to correctly communicate this issue.

So I got an email from an older man in his 50s. He gave me permission to relate this in my blog entry as long as I didn't use his name. He has as an acquaintance a 26 year old neighbor whom he has grown close to. This younger man has confided in him that he felt a connection to this older man because he never really knew his father, as his father abandoned his mother before he was born. So this younger man viewed the older man as a father figure, someone he could ask for guidance. What complicates the matter is that the older man is gay but is masculine and the younger man does not yet know. On top of this the older man has fallen in love with the younger man. The younger man has a girlfriend of several years who is pressuring him to marry her. The older man inquired of me if I could do conjure worker to break them up and then work to turn the young man gay so that he would be with him in a full relationship. So is this possible?

The answer is an emphatic no. You can not turn a straight man gay anymore than you can turn a gay man straight. People are hard-wired with regard to their sexual preference. So no matter how many spells are performed this young man will never switch teams and become the life partner of this older man. Reality just doesn't work like that. I don't know what else to write to be able to express how impossible this is. It's not in the nature for a straight man to want to stop having sex with women and focus only on sex with men, let alone one particular man. It's not in the nature for a straight men to switch from heterosexual masturbation fantasies to homosexual fantasies. It's not in the nature of a straight man to be romantically committed to a homosexual man. If you attempt to perform or hire spell casters to achieve this then not only are you trying to swim upstream but in reality you are at the bottom of Niagara Falls trying to swim back up it. It's not going to happen. It's not going to happen. It's not going to happen. So any dreams of an openly gay relationship with a straight man will never manifest in reality and should remain solely in the realm of one's imagination.

Let me now turn to sexuality, and specifically male sexuality. I first need to stress two things to my readers. Male sexuality is actually quite complex and most men, perhaps the majority of men, lie about their sexual history and sexual desires.

Sexuality is a spectrum. On one end is 100% straight. On the other end is 100% gay. Only a very small minority of men exist at either end. The overwhelming majority of men fall somewhere in between the two, in the "bisexual zone". However, the majority of such men will say they are completely straight. They may actually believe they are telling the truth. They may belong to the opinion that same-sex desires do not count unless you actually perform the deed, or that repressing and ignoring one's past sexual experiences makes one be 100% straight. What they are really saying is that they prefer females as sex partners but they confuse that fact for being "100% heterosexual".

If you aren't familiar with the Kinsey scale of human sexuality then I would recommend you check out the following link:

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Kinsey_scale

You may also test yourself at the below link. Please answer truthfully. There's no need to lie as nobody will know your answer. I took the test and even though I haven't had sex with a man it said I'm a Kinsey 3, so go figure.

http://psymed.info/kinsey-scale-test

So the Kinsey scale goes like this:

0 - Exclusively heterosexual
1 - Predominately heterosexual, only incidentally homosexual (may have experimente one time or had one same-sex lover but the rest of the sex partners were of the opposite sex.)
2 - Predominately heterosexual, but more than incidentally homosexual (may have experimented more than one time or has had more than one same-sex lover, though lovers of the opposite sex still outnumber same-sex lovers.)
3 - Equally heterosexual and homosexual (true bisexuality, "fake bisexuality" is Kinsey 1, 2, 4, or 5, as all of these clearly have an actual preference)
4 - Predominately homosexual, but more than incidentally heterosexual (may have experimented more than once with the opposite sex or may have had 2 or more opposite sex lovers. However, same-sex lovers outnumber the opposite sex lovers.)
5 - Predominately homosexual, only incidentally heterosexual (meaning may have experimented with the opposite sex at least once or had one opposite sex lover.)
6 - Exclusively homosexual
X - Asexual

So based on the above, the overwhelming majority of men will be either a 1, 2, 3, 4, or 5. Only a very small minority of men will be either a 0 or a 6. So why is this important to know? Because this implies that any man between 1-5 has had sexual interest in the same sex and thus is vulnerable to same-sex seduction.

You can not turn a straight man gay. It's never going to happen. However, a gay man can seduce and have sex with a straight man. It happens far more often than people may realize. (For this purpose view 0, 1, and 2 as "heterosexual", 3 as "bisexual", and 4, 5, and 6 as "homosexual".) So in the example above, the older man could potentially seduce the younger man but it would only be sex and not a full, romantic relationship.

On a different note, a woman I know approached me to help with her teenage son. She discovered that he was looking at gay porn on his computer. She knows that guys look at porn and she knows the teens are curious but she was concerned because she only found gay porn on his computer. She wanted me to find out if he was gay. I told her that she needs to give him room and time to figure himself out and that just because there wasn't any straight porn on the computer doesn't mean he's not straight. A man's porn viewing habits may not translate to any real-world desire. That's just the reality. Many straight men have viewed gay porn. I've caught multiple people in my life watching gay porn. I do not view any of them as being gay. Instead, I view porn as a fantasy world and I give people the freedom to watch whatever they chose without feeling the need to label them. As long as the porn is legal then the viewer shouldn't be judged. So I talked to the boy about how I know he looks at porn because all guys do. I never mentioned his mother at all and what she found. I just gave him pointers on when it is not acceptable to watch porn, such as in public, and how to cover his tracts after the fact. I told him I don't want a situation where his brothers and sisters turn on the computer and see porn because he didn't properly clean up. So is it normal for straight men to look at gay porn? -Yes. It is. Gay porn is forbidden, and thus holds a fascination. Looking at gay porn allows a form of experimentation without actually doing the deed.  Think of it like ice cream. Vanilla is fine. However, sometimes you may want chocolate, or strawberry. Every now and the you might crave something new and different. So think of gay porn as just a flavor, something to spice up one's fantasy life and not an actual indicator of behavior or real-world preference. Besides, I know plenty of females who watch gay porn, as in two men having sex. When I asked a female friend who admitted to watching gay porn why she did so her answer was, "because it's hot". So there you go.

Finally, I want to touch on straight men who want to have sex with other straight men. I know it sounds like a contradiction but it happens. These men are usually a 2 or 3 on the Kinsey scale. They may clearly be bisexual but they refuse such label and insist that they are straight. They usually have had more than one instance of same-sex experimentation in the past. Most of these men will stop same-sex dabbling by the time they get married. However, some continue on and they create convoluted excuses why such behavior is not cheating. These same-sex sexual encounters tend to be of the anonymous kind, using Craigslist and gay apps like Grindr or Scruff to meet other similarly interested men. These encounters are rarely to never romantic in nature. It's strictly sex and it's usually for just one hook-up. Sometimes the sex may be good and so the man keeps coming back for more sex but this does not usually result in any friendship between the pair. Eventually one will tire of the experience and will break it off. None of these men will leave their wives for men. If they are caught, most women will eventually forgive them and the marriage is usually not destroyed. Really only men on the 4, 5, or 6 on the Kinsey scale end up leaving their wives for other men because ultimately they are living a lie because their clear preference is for men, while 1 or 2 on the Kinsey scale truly prefer women over men and have no issues breaking off or stopping same-sex sexual encounters.

Ultimately, it all boils down to the reason why you can't use magic to turn a straight man gay but can seduce him is because sex and love are two different things for men. Most straight men fall in love with women even though they may have sexual attraction for other men. Additionally, I would add that most straight men learn from simple life experience that romantic relationships with other straight men simply are doomed from the start. It's kinda hard for two assholes to learn to love each other.

For the curious: The majority of all same-sex sexual contact between men is usually mutual masturbation and/or oral sex. Among those that engage in anal sex, most who have sex with men prefer to dominate their women but be dominated by men. This is true for even the most rugged and manly of all straight men who enjoy sex with other straight men.



8 Honest Reasons Why Some Straight Men Enjoy Gay Sex

The Bro-Job: Why Straight Men Secretly Have Sex With Each Other

It's Just A Bro-Job. No Homo.

Looks Like A Lot Of Straight Dudes Are Watching Gay Porn, Science Says

Over A Fifth Of Straight Men Watch Gay Porn, Study Finds


Here is another sexuality scale called the Klein Sexual Orientation Grid. As with the test for the Kinsey scale, answer truthfully as nobody will know the results except for you. I took this test and scored a 2.4, which is roughly at the boundary between a 2 and a 3 on the Kinsey scale. The Klein test takes into account other factors such as which sex you prefer to socialize with, which sex you mostly fantasize about, and your ideal choice.

http://sid.southampton.gov.uk/kb5/southampton/directory/advice.page?id=RsuF5ehfWvQ&familychannel=10-4





Saturday, April 1, 2017

Lamp Tip - Floating Wicks


Got these at Hobby Lobby. They were on sale for $1.99. I've seen them online for about $12. It comes with three plastic floats (one removed from the package and is in use) and a great deal of wicks. Hell of a bargain!

If you conjure with lamps that you make yourself, compared to using an oil or kerosene lamp, then you will need some form of wick, either homemade or purchased, to use. You can purchase multiple types online or in stores in your area. Many of them come with relatively small floats that the wicks are inserted into. The problem with them is that since they float they can get very near the edge or rim of a glass container that is used to hold the oil. This may cause the spot to over-heat and crack. The kind above has large floats that act as a buffer, preventing the flaming wick from ever getting too close to the rim. They also come with a great deal of wicks and three floats.

There is only one drawback. Each individual wick really only lasts maybe a day, two at the most, and then you will need to extinguish the flame and replace the wick if you want to continue the burn. One way to get around this is to use a helper candle. When it's type to replace the wick then light the helper candle from the flame of the wick and then you can safely extinguish the wick. Replace with a new one and then use the flame from the helper candle to light the new wick. That way the flame is perpetuated for as long as you want to keep this up.

I do love lamps and I apologize as I really haven't touched on them enough. One reason is that I've toyed with writing my own book and wanted to save lamp stuff for it. So I'm debating what, if anything, I should reveal in my blog entries.

Wednesday, March 29, 2017

Boo Hag Got Me Again Last Night

So annoying! I went to bed around midnight last night. I woke up a little after 1 am and was completely paralyzed except I could wiggle one finger on my left hand. My eyes were open and I could see to the end of my room. I did not feel a presence or see anything out of the ordinary. I heard my dogs snoring and there was a "womp-womp"-type noise in the background. Don't know what that was about. At one point I managed to raise my left arm a bit and then raise my upper body up from the bed but then it felt like a force pushed me right back down. I decided to stop fighting it and go back to sleep so I closed my eyes but then I immediately got scared because I couldn't see anymore and it was very hard to open my eyes. I then decided to fight it. I remember that you are supposed to cuss out the hag so I was thinking, "Get off me you fat fuckin' bitch!". However, I'm not sure if I actually said it out loud. Then all of a sudden it was over and I sat up in bed. So there you go. If you want to fight the hag you got to cuss her out. I really hate this shit. At least I don't usually see the visual stuff like seeing the witch or demon, or even feeling a presence like most people do and experience when being hag-ridden.

Sunday, March 26, 2017

My New Grimoire!

So last year it dawned on me that I was highly disorganized when it comes to recording my magical workings and remedies. I have a zillion spiral notebooks filled with writings. I have index cards and sticky notes with quick herbal lists and recipes for this and that, and I have about a million of saved Word documents on my computer. My desktop is literally crammed pack with them!

The solution I came up with is to compile all of my information down into one form, instead of relying on my memory or taking forever to find something that I wrote someplace and then subsequently forgot.

My first choice was to purchase a 3 ring binder at Zazzle. I chose the one at the below link:

https://www.zazzle.com/vintage_faux_leather_print_gothic_binder-127099616586617580

When I received it in the mail I was completely dissatisfied. It was extremely ugly. I ended up accidentally leaving it in the sun for an hour and it turned a hideous shade of purple. So I threw it away. There are other styles you can buy on Zazzle but I don't recommend any of them. They are ugly and the pictures look way cooler than the actual product.

After this fiasco I decided that hand-writing all my info was traditional and therefore should be the better option. I purchased the following:


It is an Oberon Design leather journal. It comes with a hardbound blank journal. I absolutely love it! It also comes with a lined sheet that you place beneath the sheet that you are writing on as a guide for placement. It secures with a leather strip that is wound around the metal fob. This is the Celtic knot design. You can purchase your own leather journal from Oberon Design at the link below:


So I spent many a night copying my information into this. I ended up buying 3 additional blank journals because I would make a mistake or I didn't like the order of the material that I placed. The first mistake I made was to write in pencil and this ended up causing my writing to be smeared and faded. This got to me but what really ruined it for me was that I quickly realized that I had to write extra small in order to fit in all the information. So that's what I did. The results were handwriting so small that I needed a magnifying glass to read them. I realized this was not going to work. 

After some deep thinking I came to the realization that I'm a realist. This is 2017, at the time of my writing this blog entry, and that handwriting a personal grimoire is simply no longer practical. I realized that the easiest and simplest method would be to have my grimoire be completely digital. However, I am a hands-on person, loving tactical stimulation, as well as enjoying the visual and olfactory experience of holding, seeing, and smelling something in my hands. I realized that my personal grimoire had to have a physical representation as well. So I quickly deduced that my original instinct was correct. I needed a 3 ring binder. 

While at work I did a quick YouTube search of "3 ring binders book of shadows" (I hate that the term "book of shadows" is being used for all personal magic journals now) and found several YouTube videos of people making their own unique, and often ugly, versions. I was not satisfied with any of the methods presented. I thought surely there has to be a better option out there for me. As I was sitting there just staring at my monitor my thumb began moving without my conscious willing of it and I ended up tracing a clockwise circle on the monitor and then I made a cross over that. I mumbled the words, "3 ring binder that is right for me quickly and immediately come". I pulled up Google and typed in the phrase, "leather 3 ring binder".  I clicked on every single thing that pulled up on the first page but was not satisfied because they looked too professional, such as something like a portfolio. The very last site that appeared on the first page of results was for a business named Taylormade Leather. I clicked on the link. I was floored! This was exactly what I needed and wanted! I immediately ordered a custom leather 3 ring binder. The owner emailed me back within 30 minutes and asked me to call him directly to discuss the piece I wanted. I did so and placed my order. A week later I received this in the mail:




There was one small hiccup. I had told the owner that I wanted the corner accent pieces and the belt to be faux-alligator. He assured me that it wasn't a problem and had some on hand. When I received this in the mail I immediately realized that the corners and belt didn't look right. This is not alligator but snake. It's okay, but I do prefer the look of faux-alligator leather over faux-snake leather. 

I told the owner that I wanted something dark, but not a pure black as that can look rather flat. He suggested an antique look, which combines black and brown. I love it! 

In the center, above the belt, is an engraving of the Seal of Solomon. I had originally pictured it to be larger, covering more of the front of the binder. However, I had chosen the belt option for a closure and so I had to chose on whether or not the engraving was above or below the belt, rendering it smaller. I think I made the right choice. 

This is not a cover. So you don't have to place it over a plastic 3 ring binder. As you can tell from the picture it has multiple pockets, three on the right and one on the left, which I can store various notes, recipes, and spells that I have jotted down. It is also big enough that I can tuck in a legal notepad or spiral notebook, if needed. There is an option of including a "padfolio" but because I ordered the largest size of binder, 4 inches, it could not be included. However, if any readers want to order a smaller size of binder you can add this option. 

I can not tell you how many times I smelled my new grimoire the night I received it. I just love the smell of new leather. I love the smell so much that I purchased a bottle of leather fragrance oil and I dab a drop or two on it to maintain the smell. 

The main benefit of it, other than the coolness factor, is that it can hold approximately 800 sheets of paper, if not more! So hopefully I will be able to store all or most of my information in this awesome thing. I've also purchased parchment paper and sheet protectors from Amazon.com. I can't wait to begin compiling all my spells and recipes! 

If you would like to order your own custom leather 3 ring binder then visit the site below. You can also order your own custom leather Bible cover! I think you will be just as pleased with the outcome as I was! 


P.S. The Oberon Design leather journal will not go to waste. I've decided to purchase a lined blank filler book and turn it into either my non-magical personal journal or use it to record my poetry.